Week 27. Go Shorty, it's ur Birfday

Back to it I suppose.  Nothing extraordinarily exciting these last few weeks, but if I don't write it down, I'll forget.  I'm 28 now.  Wooh!  It's a happy number.  No seriously it is:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happy_number

I have the same birthday as Hulk Hogan, Melky Cabrera, Joe Rogan, and some other people.  I'm not that interested in how they celebrated their birthday.  Well, maybe Hulk's.  I know I had a great time for my birthday!

SO DID I!  

The previous week was quite nice.  I decided to head out to Bahrain, and go to a resort.  Funny thing, it had everything that I have over here.  Nice big comfortable bed, private beach, and an amazing swimming pool, and a masseuse.    But key difference.  There are women over there.  You can get a massage from a woman.  You can hang out with your girl over there.  It makes all the difference.  We only were there for a day, it's Ramadan, so there was really no one there.  It was almost eerie.

So no one goes on vacation for Ramadan.  Why would you?  It'd be a waste if you were actually celebrating it.  Hey, lets go and swim?  Well, I would, but then we'd be even more exhausted, since we haven't eaten all day.  Let's go sit by the pool.  Nope, too hot, and we'd dehydrate.  Well, let's go eat some nice dinner.  OK, it's all going to be arabic food, since its Iftar.  Hmm, let's deal with it at home, and then go on vacation later.  What does that mean for us?  Well, it means that we have an entire resort hotel to ourselves.  AWESOME!  Well, it was.  Then it was kinda creepy.  It's like some weird movie where everything is normal, but everyone just disappeared.  What movie is that like?  One of my favorites.  The Langoliers.

Be a good boy, or the Langoliers will get you!

Only, there are a few people there to cook, and what not.  We maybe saw a total of 20 people the entire time we were there.  Including staff.  It meant that we were able to get late checkout for free, and we didn't have to wait for anything really.  I'd like to think that it was because I'm special.  Oh, if you don't believe me, here's proof.

Only a few people that my name actually starts with "M".  Or that when I do an online reservation, I always put Mr. under the first name.  

 The name of the hotel was the  "Sofitel Bahrain Zallaq Thalassa Sea & Spa."  Quite a mouthful.  The expedition started at 7:30, which is nice, since I got a chance to sleep in for a bit.  The drive up is normally about 1 hour, and 1 to 2 hours So, Sofitel is about 20 minutes south of where the normal drop off point was.  We got dropped off at the mall, and I was unsure as to whether there would be food available.  

All the restaurants in the middle east are closed during Ramadan, you can eat, but normally it'll be in one of the higher upscale hotels, and hidden from view.  You aren't allowed to eat or drink in public, it's kinda insulting, and it's fair.  If I could eat or drink, and saw someone chugging away, I'd be pissed.  Especially since the other big things that people do over there can't be done till after sunset as well.  No sex, and no smoking.  The bars, and alcohol, are extra prohibited.  Once again, the 5 stars will allow you to do what you want in your own room, but you just have to be aware.  No big deal, just takes some planning ahead.  We were there a couple weeks before, and we just made sure to go to the store and buy big.  That was a nice, yet very quiet weekend.  We bought enough food for 6 people.  There were 4 people in the hotel.  There was quite a bit of focus on breakfast, not too much for lunch, and we were going out for dinner.  There was some leftover pico de gallo, which made an awesome omelette.  Of course, I had to add some chorizo, well, because I could.  Everything tastes better with chorizo.  There wasn't as much to do, we watched quite a bit of television, if you haven't seen the movie "Iron Sky," I'd strongly suggest it.  It's one of the most ridiculous movies that I just love to watch.  Insert all the hilarious things you could think about.  Nazi's, the moon, space ships, stereotypes, Sarah Palin, and Charlie Chaplin.  And it just gets more and more crazy.  

This deserves a cult following.  

But back to the birthday weekend, I bought some snacks for the hotel in case there wasn't food.  Of course this was quite the nice hotel, so we were able to eat, so the snacks were left for me to bring back over to Saudi, not to be eaten at the hotel.  The restaurant, was good, I'm a sucker for fancy hamburgers, and they did have wagyu beef.  If you get a burger, then you just get high marbled beef trimmings.  Good enough for me, it ends up being rich and delicious.  Pretch had a steak, with foie gras on it.  Super fatty goose liver. 

Guess which one is the foie gras?

On paper, it's an interesting contrast of methods of treating animals.  When I think of Kobe beef, I think of this happy cow, eating beer, and getting massaged.  When I think of foie gras, I think of a sad goose, getting force fed.  So sad goose liver onto top of drunk cow meat.  A quick googling shows that the beef is treated just like any other beef.  Small cages, and massage so that they can get fatter, and not collapse on their own weight.  So not great, but I think one of the comments said it best, if I really was worried about where half of my food came from, I'd probably just stop eating.   Especially if I think of this guy massaging my food.

Hanz is a professional cow massager.  He REALLY gets into character

The pool was spacious, and temperature controlled.  I've never really swam in the ocean before.  It was exactly like I thought.  Really really salty.  Made swimming easier, since I was more buoyant, but the water was much more warm than I thought it would be.  It was pretty much as hot as it was outside.  It really burns if it gets in your eyes too.  I wouldn't recommend it.  Well, if you're a big baby like me.

I'll just have to stick with the fresh water pool.  Darn!

The highlight of the trip I think was going to spa and massage place.  I've never gone for a massage before, and I don't think I'll do it until I do something physical enough that requires muscles to be massaged.  But in this case, it was nice, and really got the mental stresses away.

So we start off by getting there a couple of hours early, so that we can try out the other accomodations at the spa.  Accomodations?  What else can there be?  Well, there's a salt water pool, and another indoor pool.  Sounds great.  After the previous experience, I wasn't quite looking forward to it, to be honest, but hey, let's give it a try.  The salt water pool, when it's cooled, cleaned (not slimy) and with on demand jacuzzi jets is really a treat.  With very little wave movement, I just laid back, and floated around the pool.  Buoyancy again.   Salt water still burns in the eyes, but at least it's cooling and refreshing as it burns.

I received what they called an "indian massage" which was a normal massage, in which they used warmed sesame oil.  It was only a water bottle's worth, but it felt like a gallon's worth.  It was nice, I wasn't expecting it in the hair.  The warm oil was very nice, although it felt like I was being made into something for a stir fry. My masseuse was a short tiny Chinese lady who looked small, and petite, until she had to go to work.  She had some wicked strong fingers.  I knew that I picked the right massage when I get in, and she says "You might want to put on the temporary underwear, it's going to get a little messy."  It's not what YOU think, you dirty minded people, the oil just gets everywhere, and well, I don't think Pretch would have appreciated it.

Like this.  Only with a lady.  And I'm laying down.  And sans the headband.    

Well, afterwards, we hit the steam room.  (Separate steam rooms).  And I proceed to know what dumplings feel like.  I'm completely coated in sesame oil, and go steam for 10 minutes.  I'm delicious.  Probably a little raw in the middle.  And a bit fatty.  I prefer to use the word marbled.  Well, after the steam room (by myself of course, which probably is a good thing),  I hit the showers, and shampoo like 4 times, and I still smell like lightly toasted sesame seeds.  Not bad.  Pretch smells like a Panda Express.  Haha!  That's what you get for having flowing long hair.

It was a nice weekend, and a very different one.  Not a drop of alcohol, which I don't think has happened, well since I've turned 21.  I had a great time, and am ready to start a new week of work.  Well, hopefully.

Oh, just so I don't forget.  I did go eat at Iftar at Bushido, we drove back into town to meet up with a friend for dinner.  It wasn't Asian, it was Arabic, it was tasty, and I had lamb brain (way too gamy) and lamb tongue (also way too gamy, but better texture.  They probably could have trimmed the tastebuds a little better, it's a weird texture tastebuds to tastebuds.  Like making out with something you're about to eat.)

It didn't look this good.  "BRAINS!!!!"